Frostee Rucker is appealing his one-game suspension imposed by god for violating the league's conduct policy. This is interesting. Rucker's domestic violence case was settled in April, however, the actual crime took place while Rucker was in college. Read that, in college. Charges were filed about two months after the Bengals drafted him.

So, if we're consistent here, that means that all players that have "conduct issues" in college, well before the conduct policy was ever dreamed up, should also be eligible for one-game suspensions. Right? Roger Goodell isn't playing god against the Bengals because no fool will speak up against the commissioners Randle Patrick McMurphy like judgment calls. Or is he?

And does the team's spokesman, Jack Brennan, say anything else but "no comment"? We're kidding, Jack.