I tune into 1530 today and hear Lance babbling.  This guy doesn't know if the ball is stuffed or pumped and annoints himself qualified to label Marvin Lewis a "hack".  Granted Sunday's loss to B'more was a joke.  Palmer had the worst game of his career while Falco (who prior to Sunday was best known for his hit song Amadeus) had his only game of his career.  The defense again showed America's youth football players how not to tackle.  All in all the Bengals showed the league how not to win a football game, all while B'more showed me how not to pre game. 

I had traveled to that shit hole of a town to enjoy the season opener.  I was shocked that the entire town smelled like a bum's nutsack until I walked out of my hotel and noticed that most of America's unemployed were in town for the opener too.  First I walked through the much ballyhooed Inner Harbor section of town.  The ESPN Zone wasn't opened until 11:30 (what???) and other watering holes had the energy of an insurance seminar.  We walked towards the stadium to get a drink and saw something you'd never find in the Nati at 10 am,  open parking spots in lots less than a 1/2 mile from the stadium.  We pressed on thinking we must be in the wrong spot, until we got to the Raven Walk which was the only sign of life in the whole town....and it wasn't much to speak of.  A few tents selling bbq and beer and playing...get this, Baggo.  Not Cornhole, but Baggo.  Playing Baggo is like shooting a BB gun after you've shot a Bazooka.  The worst part about playing Baggo is the 1999 court ruling stating that you have to call your dad to let him know you are gay (it is in the Geneva Convention, look it up).  B'more guy:  Come to Cincy. Set your alarm.  Splash some water on your face.  Walk down to Longworth's or to Lot D and watch a real town with real fans pregame like men, albeit for a mediocre team.  In a nutshell B'more is the worst NFL town I have ever traveled to. 

Back to my original point...The Bengals didn't look real good in what I felt was a must win game.  But, for Lance McCallister to call Marvin a hack is out of bounds.   Marvin Lewis has had success, however modest, in the NFL.  He has a ring.  He has been a D coordinator and somehow was qualified enough to earn the job as a head coach.  I know you are going to say, "yeah, but it was the Bengals who hired him, so it doesn't count."  Well as dumb as Mike Brown may be, he was smart enough not to hire you, me or Lance McCallister.  Until you, I or LM gets an interview I will assume that Marvin is more qualified.  I will assume he knows more about football.  I will also assume he knows more about what is going on with his team. Furthermore he coaches in a league where parity is king.  It has long been said that it is an 8-8 league.  Marv has managed to amass a 42-39 record during his first 5 seasons.  I have been disappointed with the Bengals over those years, but when I think back to the final game of 2002 when I was walking to the stadium.  Hundreds of fans had placed their tickets under a windshield wiper in disgust.  The Bengals were the worst team of the decade of the 90s and the early 2000s weren't shaping up too well either.  Lesson learned?  It could be worse, it was worse! 

I am not a Marvin fan.  He is condescending in his press conferences.  He has turned a blind eye while his high dollar thugs get all liqoured up and embarass an otherwise conservative town.  He has underachieved with a talented team.  With that said he cannot be called a hack.  A hack is a golfer who shoots 120.  A hack bowls a 98.  A hack goes 3-13.  Anyway...who is Lance?  Where is his blinding success?  He has had some success in his field, but he isn't Jim Rome or Dan Patrick.  He is in a small market, he does a reasonable job.  I would say by most standards Lance is 8-8 day in and day out, season in and season out.  There is nothing wrong with that.  He works hard.  Most of us in this world are 8-8.  What bothers me is that he perpetuates the front running personality our fans have become known for. 

As a town we have a great pre game atmosphere (for now).  We have a cool stadium.  We have some exciting players such as Carson and Chad, but the second things don't go right...as soon as the deck is stacked against us, we fold.  Look up Cubs fan, look up Browns fan, look up Celtics fan.  When are we going to believe in our team for more than one loss and let the team and the coach do what they do and, I promise, the team and coach will let you do what you do when you go to the office?  When?  Lance and most Cincy fans remind me of Bosko in All the Right Moves.  You throw trash on Coach's lawn just because his fullback fumbled trying to run out the clock?  I just hope if B'more guy does show up to see how a real town does it on game day it isn't too late.  What if we are 3-7 or 4-6 when B'more comes to town?  Are we going to be there to show them how to do it?  Or worse what if we aren't around to show B'more how to do it and us fans aren't around to show support for the Bengals and Mikey pulls an Art Modell on us?  I, for one, don't want to see those Mayflower trucks pulling onto 75.