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So I thought I'd try my hand at the list with a Cincy slant...
10. Big Dawg: This fat bastard beat anorexia and gained fame in the greater Cleveland area. He would be higher on the list if he or his Browns were relevant. Luckily for us he is a heart attack waiting to happen and we won't have to see this tub o' goo for too long.
9. Lance McCalister: Lance is a goober. He has never worn a jock. He hasn't the slightest idea whether the ball is stuffed or pumped, whether it is pigskin or velvet. Listen to him babble for more than a half hour a week and you will develop gay tendencies.
8. Pittsburgh Fans: I understand that you are proud of your titles. I also understand that you have nothing else to be proud of. I also understand that you might be a little upset about when Begals fans come to town and bang all your guido girls, but lets face it. I (and every other dude from anywhere other than Pittsburgh) am two points higher in looks when I visit Pitt. If I am a 7 at home, I am a 9 in Pitt. Why? I don't know, but I'd start by checking the water. Your grossly disfigured tribe should be quarantined. You come here and start heckling us about your 6 pack of titles and all of that, but it is us who laughs last when you have to make the 4 hour drive home with a L knowing that you are going home to a shitty economy and a lifetime of Iron City.
7. Pujols: This guy dominats the NL Central, but our hatred for him stems from envy. There isn't a Reds fan who wouldn't bang Oprah for Pujols in a Reds jersey.
6. Joe Montana deserves a good pissing for engineering the game winning drive in SB XXII, but the real culprit is Lewis Billups. Hey #24 your hands are on backwards and now we are heading for a decade of futility. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GJFOBI1cZaM
5. wHines Ward: I would put this guy in the same category as Pujols except for the fact that he looks a lot like the fat guy from 2 Live Crew and cries almost as much as Tiger woods. He does solid work on the field, but man he is a bitch. And by the way, the hit on Rivers was clean in my opinion.
4. Brian Kelly: He went from being on the "most loved list" to the "most hated list" just by jerking us around. I can't say I blame him for taking the loot, but just be honest. We should have known when he showed up with his car salesman haircut.
3. Mick Cronin: He has earned some hatred recently due to the Bearcats dissapointing play, but I hate him more for looking so much like Homer Simpson and for getting so much black ass. The real culprit here is probably Nancy Zimpher who ran Huggs out of town.
2. Big Ben Roethlisberger: He was a douche bag even when he was playing at Miami of Ohio. Now he is crashing motorcycles and mouth raping broads all while winning titles despite his inability to win the AFC North. Its frustrating to Bengals fans.
1. Mike Brown: This guy has a whole website devoted to being hated. whodeyrevolution.com has flown banners, made urinal mints and tried to initiate a grass roots coup of Mike Brown and Katie Brown Blackburn. Winning cures all. Give us a championship Mikey and I'll take you off the list.
I know, I know. You are all wondering where Raven's LB Ray Lewis is on this list. In my opinion he falls under the Pujols rule. We'd love to have him here. he goes about his business. Other than a pesky obstruction of justice charge way back when he has been a decent guy. The only reason you hate him is because he is good. He'd be #11 on my list.
Thanks for reading.
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