Reports surfaced on Friday (the busiest day of my life as a blogger) that the Cincinnati Bengals came to terms with Arizona Cardinals guard Deuce Lutui. The Bengals were offering a two-year deal worth $8.75 million, with $5 million during the first season; even with well-known issues regarding his weight. And reportedly because of his weight, the Bengals failed his physical, which voided the agreement between the two sides.

Lutui returned to Arizona later that night, signing a one-year contract with the Cardinals, calling his failed physical an "eye-opening experience."

"I'm not doing this because you're telling me, it is for my whole self, my health and everything like that."

As for a message to the Cincinnati Bengals:

"Just understand what's leaving the door and I'll see you guys this Christmas."

After reading this, we're fairly certain that Rey Maualuga just punched a cheeseburger, imagining Lutui's face. But that's kind of how we like our football players, isn't it? Totally awesome with a side of insane.