1st pick, Andrew Luck
, as scripted.
2nd pick, yep, RG3. The ‘skins didn’t trade all those picks just to reach for Weeden or Tannehill
3rd pick, Browns
trade up because they have too many picks. Take who they would have taken anyway.
Then go Kalil, Blackmon, etc...
Some popular Bengals
’ targets at #17 like Kuechly, Barron & Floyd fall off the board in the top 10.
#15 The Seahawks
make a WTF move with Bruce Irvin
. He ends up justifying the pick.
#16 Quinton Coples
, the talented DE who ‘took a year off’ supposedly goes next
Almost in unison, the shouts of Cincy Jungle nation screaming "DeCastro! DeCastro!" are heard resonating throughout the internet. Somehow the supposed best Guard prospect in God’s lifetime is still sitting there at #17. It’s a slam dunk pick.
The commish walks to the podium, carrying a note card and wearing a smirk that almost says, ‘you Bengals’ fans should know better by now...’
The pick is announced, "Dre Kirkpatrick. Cornerback. Alamaba."
Stunned silence replaces the din of "DeCastro" chants that previously rang loud and clear. Several are left to wonder if they mis-heard the commish. They did not. Highlight reels roll showing Dre making big hits on receivers who unexpectedly have balls thrown their way off timing due to the relentless Bama pass rush. Dre is all smiles as he dons a new Bengals’ cap. Fans are befuddled why DeCastro isn’t wearing that cap. Somewhere in Cincinnat a new parent at the hospital quickly changes his newborn son’s name from DeCastro to Dre.
Cincy Jungle fans go through the emotions of WTF, followed by another WTF, followed by an assurance of "DeCastro may still be there at pick 21. It’s ok. Breathe. Only 4 more picks."
grab DE Melvin Ingram
reach for DE Shea McDlellin
grab potential Bengals target Kendall Wright
The Cincy Jungle crowd renews their chants of "DeCastro! DeCastro!" Only, now the shouts are louder, hoping that Marvin Lewis will somehow hear them through the bomb shelter walls of the war room. The consensus becomes ‘Wow, DeCastro fell to #21. The football gods are smiling upon the city of Cincinnati tonight!’
Again the commish walks to the podium, again wearing that smirk which endorses the sentiment, ‘you Bengals’ fans just never learn...’
The commish announces, "The Bengals have traded the 21st selection to the Patriots
. New England is now on the clock."
Again David DeCastro has been passed on. Again Cincy Jungle fans go through the emotions of WTF, followed by another WTF, followed by a third WTF. They try to assure themselves that DeCastro will still be there at #27, but they know not even the football gods are feeling that generous on this night.
#21 Chandler Jones
#22 Browns reach for Weeden, as some predicted
#23 OT Reiff goes. Huh, did DeCastro get caught with drugs?
#24 Pittsburgh provides a new reason to be hated, grabbing DeCastro all the way down at #24.
#25 Hightower, well so much for grabbing Maualuga’s replacement
#26 Whitney Mercilus
, the guy with a last name as a first name and a strange name as a last name
OK, we missed on DeCastro. They just weren’t going to take a guard in round 1. I understand, that’s just how Marvin rolls. We traded down to take Doug Martin
, and we’ll just grab Cordy, Silatolu, Osemele, or Konz in the second. I can convince myself to live with that. Just hoping that Kirkpatrick kids plays more than our previous Bama pick (Moobs) did in his rookie year.
Again the commish walks to the podium, again wearing that smirk warning the Bengal fan that nothing is as it seems on this night.
The pick is announced, "Kevin Zeitler
. Guard. Wisconsin."
The Cincy Jungle fans ask themselves, "did we just pass on DeCastro TWICE to grab a guy 3 picks later who has a 2nd round grade comparable to folks like Cordy, Silatolu, Osemele and Konz?" They know the answer is ‘yes’, but they dare not answer the question they have just asked themselves. They shout aloud, "the only thing crazier would be if the Jags would be so dumb as to grab a punter in the third round!"
Ultimately the round 2 pick (#53) rolls around with Osemele, Konz & Mike Adams available. With no need for a Guard any more, they take a highly regarded, but unneeded Devon Still
. Fans wonder what could have been....
This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Cincy Jungle's writers or editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of Cincy Jungle's writers or editors.