Rank the Bengals 30th and watch the Queen City defend to the bitter end. Matt Mosley (ESPN's Hashmarks) ranked the Bengals 30th in his rankings. Bengals fans threw a "hissy". Let me quickly ask you, my readers, MY PEOPLE, this: Are the Bengals worse than the Jets, Bills, Saints, Falcons, Vikings and Raiders? But who's throwing a hissy? Comments on a blog? I didn't. But I never claim to be the sole voice of Cincinnati Bengals fans. I don't care for rankings. They are too arbitrary to define any reasonable conversation. It's the same as comparing Babe Ruth and Barry Bonds. Go ahead. Find one that supports one, find another that supports the other. Watch with popcorn Mountain Dew.

The first reader comment read: "wahhh!!! Bungle fans. You need to show some heart and win against the tough teams." This would make sense if, you know, fans played. But they wouldn't be fans at that point -- they'd be players. Players can be fans of the team they represent? Sure. I guess. But. I don't know. Reading that comment and most others just dropped 50 IQ points so I... must... move... on.

Now the world can start relaxing again and going about their business. Not because peace on Earth prevailed. Not because the environment suddenly cures whatever ills we're told this week that makes her sick. Not because politicians found within their heart to do what's right. Not because aliens came to Earth and joined with our species creating a super-species that lives forever and travels the stars at ______ (enter Warp Speed if Star Trek fan... enter Light Speed if Star Wars fan).

Why?

Because now Levi Jones is happy. He's starting again!

"It’s returning home, where I’ve been for six years. I should have never left."

Don't worry, Levi. Having known this, we'd rather you didn't sign either. If anything, the Bengals would have been able to sign someone that doesn't baby themselves publicly on defense. What's that word that Marvin used earlier this week describing his players?

Paul Daugherty takes the Bengals to task. [Enquirer]