Bengals should donate Johnson's missed checks to charity
UPDATE II: Even his boy, T.J. Houshmandzadeh agrees that the Bengals should trade the prima donna. Sure, he could be saying that simply to help out his friend. Though we wonder. Houshmandzadeh knows prima enough, probably has heard his rants during the off-season, generally thinking that prima will be a distraction. Which I think we all generally agree with. When Palmer said that Chad will be there, prima freaked. T.J. says "I think eventually he'll show up, but then you have to worry about how much of a distraction he'll be." We'll see if prima reacts the same way with T.J. And we'll see if Chad will put his mouth will his, well, we'll just see.
UPDATE: In their latest, the Pro Football Talk guys question Mark Curnutte's constant reminder that the team can't afford $8 million in dead money. We contend that it would be Mike Brown's wet dream to lose $8 million in cap (i.e., pocketing) but agree with PFT that the dead money is a way to get fans to agree to hate Johnson while supporting the team for not cutting him -- at least just yet -- to keep fire breathing Bengals fans off their back.
Bengals Nation Daily agrees with us -- Johnson is the team idiot.
Bleacher Report to Johnson: Just Shut-up Already
ORIGINAL: The Pro Football Talk guys call him Ocho Stinko. A caller in Alan Cutler's morning radio show called him Ocho Psycho. Carson Palmer said that Ocho Tardo will be at mandatory functions. Tardo is calling Palmer a liar.
Sorry Chad, but your dung stinks. We like Palmer's dung. In other words, I believe Palmer and honestly care little of what you think or say. In fact, when you talk, I get this nauseating migraine that doesn't go away until Will Farrell pounds that cowbell.
Johnson has played every excuse he can think of, from being "dissed" by head coach Marvin Lewis to demanding more money. We actually don't know anymore, he just wants to be traded. Lewis is tired of talking about it. Fans just want him gone -- he's a prime example of when God gives players physical abilities but does a Homer Simpson "d'oh" realizing that the mind will be like purgatory in an elementary rotisserie oven.
But I have to admit, I haven't heard anyone feel so sorry for themselves, forgoing $250,000 roster bonuses while guys like Eric Henderson donate footballs to a charity event in honor of the two fallen Colerain firefighters. Maybe one day Chad will stop stroking himself in the mirror long enough that he can go unsung and help others without the requirement that it be known to the entire world.
And a small suggestion to the team. Not only should they keep him and sit him, ala, Terrell Owens and the Eagles, but each bonus and game check missed, the Bengals should donate that to charity.
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11 comments
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Oh man
by sgiridharan on
Apr 16, 2008 3:40 PM EDT
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Two DTs
by Kirkendall on
Apr 16, 2008 3:46 PM EDT
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He's gotta go.
by IgnatiusJReilly on
Apr 16, 2008 6:50 PM EDT
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Oh, Good...
I know! Invite him on during the first round of the draft! C'mon, espn, don't let me down!
by BeerRun on
Apr 16, 2008 6:55 PM EDT
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Couldn't agree more....
Sure, he'd get paid, but apparently all that money has already been spoken for (child support, cars, houses, gold teeth, etc.)
Bastard....here's hoping the Bengals have the same Tiki-less, Shockey-less experience the Giants had last year
by bengalred on
Apr 16, 2008 8:41 PM EDT
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Ewing Theory
that being said, I think Chad will change is tune in a few months. Mike Brown is stubborn, and Johnson needs the spotlight.
by Smigelskas on
Apr 16, 2008 9:01 PM EDT
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Feck 'em
Fine him for every missed practice, workout.
Suspend him as soon as possible.
Play Drew Rosenhaus's "this is a historic deal" speech(after Chad signed most recent contract)during every press conference.
Stop selling the 85 jersey in the team store.
I will openly root for the Funny Bone patrons to receive his car he had "for raffle" now.
I'd love to see Ocho hook up with Farmersonly.com for a new spokesman gig. Lotta manure on both sides of that fence.
by cincybobcat on
Apr 16, 2008 9:28 PM EDT
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Ocho Poopstain
Let me ask you one thing, Ocho. Where do you want to be traded? How's Atlanta sound? Detroit? St. Louis? MIAMI?!?!?!
Now ask yourself one thing, Ocho. Why?!
I had been a Chad supporter from day one. He was entertaining and regardless of what people say, he did get the job done up until last year IMO. But he's gone far past the line with this bullshit about Carson's storytelling. If we can get a first round pick out of him I'm all for it. $8 million is a small price to pay to cure the Bengals cancer and pass it on to another franchise. We're sick of your dumbass, Ocho.
by BengalChronic on
Apr 16, 2008 9:39 PM EDT
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headline?
Watch for him at your local Goodwill Auto Auction.
by IgnatiusJReilly on
Apr 17, 2008 9:51 AM EDT
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Agreed!
http://yepyep.gibbs12.com/?p=5522
Some excerpts:
Future Hopes for "Ocho Cinco":
Stubborn Mike Brown sticks to his guns and lets him sit out the entire season
He doesn't get paid
He loses his endorsements
John Clayton stops answering his calls (then he crawls back to local media)
Bengals succeed without him
2009 season comes, he's still under contract, not getting paid
Bengals give rookie receiver Brian Robiskie #85 even though CJ is technically still signed to team
He attempts an acting career but then realizes people only liked him for the football character that no longer exists
TJ Houshmanzadeh gets a reality show to determine his new BFF and Shayne Graham is a finalist
by gibbs12 on
Apr 17, 2008 10:11 AM EDT
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Cap
It is also completely possible that our front office has no idea how the cap works.
by mp45242 on
Apr 17, 2008 5:01 PM EDT
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