Bengals Early Bird Special

Good morning everyone. I hope you all made it through your Wednesday without going insane.

One foggy night, a Bengals fan was heading north from Cincinnati and a Steelers fan was driving south from Pittsburgh. While crossing a narrow bridge both cars collide head-on.

The Steelers fan manages to climb out of his car and survey the damage. He looks at his mangled up car and states, "Man, I'm lucky to be alive!" Likewise the Bengals fan gets out of his car uninjured as well. He too felt fortunate to have survive the collision.

The Steelers fan walks over to the Bengals fan and says, "Hey man, I think this is a sign that we should put aside our petty differences and live as friends instead of being rivals.

The Bengals fan thinks for a moment and says, "You know, you're absolutely right! We should be friends. In fact, I'm going to see if something else survived the wreck."

The Bengals fan then pops open his trunk and removes a full, undamaged bottle of Jack Daniel's. He says to the Steelers fan, "I think this is another sign, we should toast to our new-found friendship. The Steelers fan agrees and grabs the bottle. After sucking down half of the bottle the Steelers fan hands it back to the Bengals fan and says, "Your turn!"

The Bengals fan calmly twists the cap back on the bottle and throws the rest of the bottle over the bridge into the river. After that he says, "No, I think I'll just wait for the cops to show up."

At least we can outsmart Steelers fans.

Here is a look at what you may have missed or overlooked from Wednesday.

• The Bengals are pleased with the results from Clint Boling at left guard.
• The 2011 Bengals are going to be a two-faced team that's filled with hope and fear.
• Reactions from around the league regarding the new kickoff procedures. The new procedures are going to kill football. There's no other way to put it.
• Bengals player report card on Nate Livings against the Detroit Lions.
• The Bengals have added yet another new face with the signing of kick return specialist LeRoy Vann.
• Lions defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh was fined $20,000 for the hit he put on Bengals quarterback Andy Dalton. Luckily Dalton wasn't injured on that play. It could have been a hell of a lot worse than what it actually was.
• Now that Carson Palmer is officially not playing with the Bengals we all thought that would be the end of the Palmer saga, right? Wrong. There is more drama from the Palmers.
• The Bengals are aiming to sign cornerback Leon Hall to a contract extension before he hits the open market after the 2011 season.
• Surprisingly the Bengals scored big TV ratings. Wait, did I read that correctly?
• Bengals coaches expect defensive tackle Pat Sims to return to practice at some point next week.
• Deacon Turner's family has filed a federal lawsuit against Kern County Sheriff Deputies.