clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Bengals vs Colts: Indianapolis shuts out Bengals 27-0

New, comments

If you're a fan of the Bengals, it might be best to pretend this was a bye week and move on. Nothing good came out of this. Nothing. Actually, if you believed in this team, you might feel like me right now. Kind of stupid.

Kirk Irwin

It seemed like the game started around the 59 second mark in the first half.

Cincinnati Bengals tight end Jermaine Gresham was arguing with Colts linebacker Erik Walden. An official interceded and Walden, apparently trying to get away from Gresham, made contact with the official and was promptly disqualified.

This was the first time that the Cincinnati Bengals picked up a first down.

A first down!

It was a momentous occasion. Let's celebrate. BRING OUT THE WOODEN STEINS FILLED WITH MEAD AND WENCHES.

This is a joke. An absolute joke. Humorless? Yes. But how could you not laugh at this? It was like watching students of stupidity trying to drink water from a bottomless bucket by using a fork. The Bengals opened Sunday afternoon with eight consecutive possessions, which ended in a three-and-out. Then when Walden was called for a personal foul (and an ejection), Cincinnati picked up their first first-down of the game. Gladly, too. Cincinnati actually earned a first down two plays later on a five-yard catch by Gresham. A timeout and a defensive offside later, the Bengals have first down from their own 47-yard line and 26 seconds remaining, with a timeout in Cincinnati's pocket. Cory Redding sacked Andy Dalton for an eight-yard loss and Cincinnati packed it up to end the first half.

We're laughing at the Bengals. Pointing and laughing. Like... we actually believed in you f***ers. This has to be nominated as the WORST first half in franchise history... Well at least since the regular season finale against the New York Jets in '09. Remember that? Frozen conditions. Cincinnati picked up a single first down (by penalty) and generated seven yards in the first half. At least Cincinnati had the excuse of half-assing the effort because the Bengals couldn't improve their postseason seeding.

After Cincinnati opened the second half with a three-and-out, their ninth of the afternoon, the Colts, already leading 10-0, expanded their lead to 17 following Dwayne Allen's 32-yard touchdown reception with nine minutes remaining in the third.

Since the team's week four bye, the Bengals were crushed by 26 points in New England, finished with a 37-37 tie against Carolina and produced an amazing first half that should insult everything the Bengals stand for.

It's the type of performance that should get someone fired. Seriously. Down by 17 points, Cincinnati had the football at their own 47-yard line with 6:38 remaining in the third quarter. If a comeback was in the cards, it was going to be now. Instead Hue Jackson calls a wide receiver pass, flipping a backwards pass to Mohamed Sanu. The wide receiver darling ran, looking to throw it, but runs out of bounds and takes a six-yard sack instead of throwing it away. Now it's second and 16. An incomplete pass, false start (Clint Boling) and quarterback sack resulted in a fourth and 26.

You lost 16 yards when given ample amounts of opportunity for a comeback?

Cornerback Adam Jones added a microscopic spark when he returned a kickoff 38 yards to the Bengals 36-yard line. After a six-yard gain by Jermaine Gresham and incomplete, Dalton launched the football down the right sidelines where Mohamed Sanu hauled down the 32-yard pass.

This was the first time that Cincinnati converted a third down opportunity, failing to generate a first down on their previous 11 third down opportunities.

Unfortunately, the stupidity returned. Cincinnati had third and goal from the eight yard line. Jackson, calling one of the worst games imaginable, calls a run. Jeremy Hill gained four yards. Following an offsides and a neutral zone infraction, Andy Dalton flipped the football to Jermaine Gresham, four yards shy of the goalline, turning it over on downs.

Right?

Awful.

If you believed, or were believing in this team, you might feel like me right now. Kind of stupid.

Great Plays

  • The Colts have third and 10 from the Bengals 41-yard line with 10 minutes remaining in the first. Reggie Wayne gets his hands on the pass, well beyond the first down marker. Cornerback Adam Jones hits Wayne, relatively hard, and frees the football loose for an incomplete pass.
  • Carlos Dunlap's effort on a six-yard Ahmad Bradshaw run that led to a forced fumble and Adam Jones' recovery. Dunlap added a quarterback sack in the second quarter, forcing the Colts to punt.
  • Darqueze Dennard downed the football at the third-yard line with 8:01 remaining in the third quarter. An offensive hold put Indianapolis at the one.
What the Hell
  • Andy Dalton had first down with 14:04 remaining in the first quarter. After looking for a free receiver, Dalton saw Jermaine Gresham, who was covered by multiple defenders. Dalton threw the football anyway and lost five yards. Seriously... was Dalton drunk? He had to be drunk.
  • With 5:32 remaining in the first quarter, Cincinnati needed nine yards to convert a third down. Mohamed Sanu ran an eight-yard curl route and fell one yard short of the first down. Either someone needs to tell Sanu to be aware of the first down marker, or tell Hue Jackson to run routes that will, at least, gain nine yards.
  • Leon Hall... catch the football man. The drop, which could have been a pick-six, led to Indianapolis' first field goal and a 3-0 lead.
(NOTE: we stopped updating this file when we realized the offense was going to flush the toilet while standing inside of it)

INJURIES
  • Vontaze Burfict left the game at the 1:51 mark in the first quarter with a neck injury. He was later declared out.
  • Leon Hall left with a back strain and was eventually downgraded to doubtful.
  • Terence Newman returned to the lockerroom midway through the third to get an IV.

INACTIVES

BENGALS COLTS
WR A.J. Green CB Darius Butler
LB Emmanuel Lamur LB Victor Butler
LB Rey Maualuga OL Lance Louis
DE Will Clarke OC Khaled Holmes
CB Chris Lewis-Harris OL James Meredith
DT Brandon Thompson DT Kelcy Quarles
OT Tanner Hawkinson DL Arthur Jones